Oscar Red Carpet - Yeah, You Looked Like a Weirdo

I am not going to belabored this. I feel bad, I really do. For one, I will never own a dress that is red carpet worthy, so who am I to talk? Two, these ladies spent a ton of time getting ready. So I do feel guilty about all of this.

But, here you go. My top three worst dressed:

Charlize Theron in Dior
Lilac disaster. This was a watered down Gaga dress. The color was not flattering. The gathered fabric on her chest was ugly and odd.

Zoe Saldana in Riccardo Tisci
The top of her dress was pretty. That was about it.

The bottom half was all kinds of messy. The slit, the ruffles, the FOUR shades of purple were all wrong.

Maggie Gyllenhaal in Dries Van Noten
The dress was pretty, just not for the red carpet. Maybe a movie premiere or charity event? Like I said in my earlier post, this dress looked as though it was pulled off a rack at Express.

Maggie, as a nominee, should have, could have, worn a dress that made a statement. At least she looked pretty and not as disastrous as some of the other ladies.

Oscar Red Carpet - My Top Three

Last night was very interesting. A lot of variety-from color, to cut, to length. A lot of slits--Mariah Carey in a red, one shoulder dress; Zoe Saldana with her purple sparkle, fluffy disaster; and JLo in a very structured, overwhelming Armani. All these dress had slits. Could this be a trend?

Nothing screamed, oh my god, that is absolutely gorgeous. Here are my top three though:

Sarah Jessica in Chanel Couture
I loved her in yellow. The material looked just as gorgeous as the silver embellishment. The craftsmanship of SJP's dress stood out partly because, there were a lot of dresses out there that could have been pulled off the racks at Express--eww... Maggie G. --what the hell??? Did someone forget to tell your stylist that you were a nominee?

This dress was made for SJP--yummy, elegant, and cutting edge.

Elizabeth Banks in Versace
A few women tried to pull off texture, a ton of texture. A lot of them failed miserably--Vera Farmiga, way too much dress, it wore her; and Jennifer Lopez, the fabric consumed her.

I loved the color of Elizabeth's dress. The bodice was fitted, and had a enough texture to make the transition to that pretty, delicate, fluffy train look seamless.

Sandra Bullock in Marchesa
The predicted winner, looked like a winner. Sandra looked elegant, age appropriate, and absolutely perfect. She took a big risk with the dress. I would have hated to hear the jokes how the girl looking like an Oscar didn't walk away with an Oscar.

Everything about her look was perfect. Even her hair was perfect. I have no idea how she got into that dress. It fit like a glove. I would love to see it up close. To feel the weight of it and touch all the different fabrics and embellishment. If I owned that dress, it would go in a gigantic shadow box for all to see.

Red Carpet!

Oscar red carpet coverage starts on E! at 6pm ET.

We will be watching. I will be criticizing anything that looks unfit for the red carpet, and envying all that is absolutely gorgeous.

And, of course, I will report back on all those I loved and hated.

Kristen Stewart, Anna Kendrick, Sandra Bullock, George Clooney (and his gf), Penelope Cruz, and Meryl Streep are just a few I am looking forward to seeing.

The Soul Collector is Back at It

Johnny Depp's wife, Vanessa, ain't too happy about his recent gig. He is now filming with none other than Angelina, Hollywood's most infamous home wrecker.

Word is, there are some steamy scenes in "The Tourist". Depp's girlfriend, wife, whatever she is, said something to the effect of, I don't want you working with that evil whore. The NY Post is reporting that a source "close to the project" said Depp is unable to get out of his contract now. Too bad.

I don't care how many children Devilina collects/helps. She is bad news. I think she would collect men too, if should get them to sign power of attorney papers.

Two Men, and a TV Show

I watch Martha Stewart's show and The View. I am not ashamed of it. I enjoy both shows. I learn something new on Martha's show and think she is hilarious. She and her guests drank throughout many of her holiday shows in December. I was like, hells yeah. I bake Christmas cookies and drink adult beverages. Great minds think alike!

The View can be a little annoying, I'll admit it. I really enjoy some of the guests though, and the celebrity gossip is fun.

Tomorrow you must record The View--two very attractive gentlemen, one show. Robert Pattinson and Mitt Romney will be appearing! That's right, tomorrow at 11am, on ABC. Record it. Set your dvr or tivo right now.

It's gonna be a heck of a lot of fun!

One of My Favorite Sites

Popsugar.com is one of my favorite sites. I visit it daily to get my celebrity gossip fix, and learn about the latest and greatest in fashion and beauty.

While I love to read about what Reese, Ben and Jen, Rob, Kristen, and dozens of others; there are a few people I can't stand. The top five people I could careless about are:

5. Katie and Suri - The story is always the same: Katie and Suri are walking around x city. Suri is wearing heels. Zzzz.....

4. Paris Hilton - She was interesting five years ago. Has she done anything since that VH1 show? I don't think so.

3. John Mayer - He has proved to be the ultimate db. He started to wear on me after hearing that whiny, body is a wonderland, song on repeat in college. Whiny guys are bad. Whiny guys that publicize their sex lives= Ultimate DB.

2. Kate Moss - Again, she was interesting, emphasis on was. You can only read so many stories about her weight, boyfriends, and drug use. She isn't even American!

1. Heidi and Spencer - They were annoying from Day 1. Spencer is the new Howard K. Stern, and Heidi is the new Anna Nicole. For some reason I find the Heidi and Spencer more annoying. They don't even try to hide the fact they are nuts. They actively try to publicize it.

Glee comes to DC?

US Weekly is reporting that the Glee cast has been invited to perform at the White House Easter Egg Roll.

Straight from the official egg roll website:
The President and First Lady have announced that this year’s White House Easter Egg Roll will be held on Monday, April 5, 2010 with the theme of “Ready, Set, Go!” promoting health and wellness. The event will feature live music, sports courts, cooking stations, storytelling and, of course, Easter egg rolling. All of the activities will encourage children to lead healthy and active lives and follow the First Lady’s ‘Let’s Move!’ initiative, a national campaign to combat childhood obesity. The White House will open its South Lawn for children aged 12 years and younger and their families. Full ticketing information is below. We hope to see you at the White House!

Aren't the kids going a little young to be fans of Glee? Teenage pregnancy and adultery don't seem like good topics for an under 12 audience. Whoever thought getting the Glee cast would be totally awesome, should maybe be regulated to West Wing tours from now on.

Anywho, new episodes of Glee begin April 13th. Wahoo!

The countdown begins.

My Fake Boyfriend is Too Young for Me

Craig and I saw Valentine's Day this weekend. It was super cute. The story lines didn't come as a big surprise, but it was just as good as I thought it would be. And I loved seeing some of my favorite actor and actresses!

I was a little disappointed with Taylor Lautner. I should have realized going in that he is playing a high school student. So he's probably gonna look like a 16 year old. And dang it, he did. I found myself mildly embarrassed. Craig is sitting right there, and I know what is going through his head. My wife has a crush on a 16 year old wolf.

At least he's 18 now.

So bottom line: Go see Valentine's Day. There are a few handsome men to see, and most of them are "age appropriate". ;)

Remember you... How could we forget?!

Over a month till New Moon is released on dvd. Ugh. I will definitely be seeing Valentine's Day--Taylor Lautner, Jen Garner, Taylor Swift, Jessica Biel, Ashton... So Jacob fix--check.

Edward though, oh Edward... I saw the trailer for Remember Me when I saw New Moon. It looked alright. The story didn't seem all that great though. Just sorta ehh.

Three months later-I need you Robert. I will see your new movie.

So I'll be supporting Rob in his new role. Anyone else going to see it just to get a fix?

Fun, Feminine Lea Michele

Let's face it, looking young and fun has become synonymous with trashy. Lea Michele has done a terrific job at keeping her look fun and age appropriate without looking like a tramp.

I can't wait to see her next red carpet ensemble!

Lady Gag Gag at the Grammys

Oh my lord Britney. I know maybe one other person (my age) who adores you as much as I do. And we have been defending you to everyone we know for YEARS. I have no idea how I can defend this though:

Oh me, oh my. Her skin and hair look great, but that dress!!!! Is it a dress? Maybe she was hanging out with the kids by the pool and threw a little something-something on top of her swimsuit?

Where is the love?

Angelina and Brad, Tiger and Elin, John and Elizabeth, REESE AND JAKE! What is going on?

Angelina and Brad are just crazy weird. They should have never been allowed to adopt those kids, not together anyway. Why are children given to people who can not even commit to each other? How can anyone be sure they will make a commitment to raising the child? I know they do a lot of good with non-profits. I try not to be critical, but something about A.J. gives me the creeps. She played that crazy girl in Girl Interrupted a little too well. To me, she will always be the chick who wore a vial of blood around her neck. Gross-a-roo. I never cared for her or him (he cheated on Jennifer!), and I could really care less if their un-committed relationship ended.

Tiger and Elin. Elin, divorce him.

John and Elizabeth Edwards. Who knows that the deal is with these two. They just legally separated, which is actually pretty interesting. I heard about this one year separation deal on the local news. I thought to myself, now that is just ridiculous. He cheated on her, and now she has to wait a year for a divorce!

So, being the resourceful person I am, I looked up the S.C. divorce laws. YOU DON'T HAVE WAIT A YEAR! They could get this done and over with in three months, if the cause for divorce was adultery. I think that fits the bill here.

I am guessing Elizabeth has something to gain by separating for a year and claiming she was "deserted". I want to say good for her, but part of me thinks she was always in this to get something. Their poor kids. They have no chance.

I have always thought Reese and Jake were super cute. This one really caught me by surprise. I thought they were the new Jen and Ben. Jen and Ben are my absolute favorite. This won't be the first time the couple have split. Unfortunately, I think this time it's for good. It sounds like Reese wasn't convinced that Jake was ready to be a daddy. I can see that. He is a bit younger.

Let's hope Carrie Underwood gets her wedding underway. We need something fun and light to break this sober mood.